El Bachelor Episode 10

Now it is time for the episode of the season I do not normally enjoy…"The Women Tell All" or as I like to call it: "Every woman's final 5 minutes of fame and final audition to be the next Bachelorette" 

El Bachelor Episode 10: It's Okay

• Mean Girls unite.  Look, I am in PR. I understand "talking points" and I know messaging…it's like they handed out cards that said chiming in on any of these topics = screen time:
• Juan Pablo was selfish. 
• Juan Pablo didn't ask anything about you. 
• Juan Pablo wasn't here for the right reasons.
• And look who chimes in. It's Danielle. Danielle who never spoke. And what does she say?
• She complains about her time communicating with El Bachelor and that he never asked about her. I'm sorry what???? 

We interrupt this commercial break to tell you:

Courtesy of abc.com 

Dancing With the Stars cast reveal Tuesday on GMA! Yes, Tuesday as in tomorrow. 

Dear friends who actually read my blog, 
Once El Bachelor ends, I think this may be my new show to blog even though I have no idea how one would do that…I have faith I can find a way. I realize there is a good chance my mom and I are the only people I know who watch but I can guarantee a fun time if you tune in, or if you just read along.

Back to Women Tell All: 

Dear ABC, Could you please post their names the entire time they are speaking? I do not know who anyone is and you take the names down too quick for me to figure it out or pay attention.

This girl on the right keeps talking and I do not know her name. 

Now this girl is talking and again, I have no idea who she is either. 

I am bored by the hot seats so I have decided I am going to give everyone who is in the hot seat tonight a theme song.

Hot Seat Sharleen: 

• Theme song: "You're Hot and You're Cold" -Katy Perry
• Not again with the cerebral connection. Not again. 

Hot Seat Renee:

• Theme song: "I've Got Nothing" -Whitney Houston
• This is literally because I've got nothing. I'm not going to try.
• But congrats to Renee on admitting she has a new love or as she affectionately called it "a situation." I like that. I think I am going to start referring to my husband as a situation too. 

Hot Seat Andi:

• Theme song: "Since You've Been Gone" -Kelly Clarkson
• Here we go with the great "It's Okay Debate" 
• Chris Harrison: How are you now? Me: I do not truly believe you are over him.
• What Andi said: I am definitely still looking for someone. This experience was great. I believe it can work. I want that love. I will continue to search for it
• What I heard: I will specifically continue to search for it as the next Bachelorette. 

Hot Seat Juan Pablo: 

• Theme song: "Feelin' Hot Hot Hot" -I don't know who sings it but it's old school and you know you know the song and you love it, even if you don't love JP
• Dear Girl I don't know, Yes you were trying to force something that wasn't there…I don't know your name so clearly neither does Juan Pablo. 
• Everyone starts getting mad and demanding the same respect the moms got. 
• Here is my question- What makes someone a mom on this show? Let me tell you one thing, if I left Chloe at home to watch The Bachelor, I would want the same respect. 

I would not take leaving this face behind lightly. 

Then Lucy speaks and says "This is not a game"…..

This is seriously coming from the girl who didn't wear shoes and wandered around nude??? 

Oh my gosh I just realized this ends at 8:30pm. I feel like I just got my evening back. This is a strange feeling…like I've been given a gift for my efforts this season. 

And then there is Chloe who is still fuming after this introduction at the beginning:

Molly Appearance #1

And then as if it wasn't bad enough, Molly gets more screen time courtesy of Sharleen, who Chloe thinks is fabulous:

Molly Appearance #2

Are.You.Kidding.Me.

Yes I have a death grip on this paper towel.
It is the only way I can deal with my anger right now without getting in trouble. 

Chloe & I will be back next week for the dramatic conclusion to this never ending season. 

Adios 'til then mi amigos!