But the thing is, this slowing down I am referring to doesn't relate to activity as in a busy schedule. It relates to a growing need I am feeling to constantly be looking at something either on my computer, my iPhone, the TV or anything else I feel I need to be paying attention to...in addition to what already has my attention in the first place. Even while I am sitting here writing this post I am getting on my phone to text or check instagram. I can sit down to read a book but I still have my phone next to me and periodically check it as well. I am beginning to think these tiny behaviors I have grown accustomed to are not tiny and not a big deal like I once thought but beginning to sneak their way into other pieces of my life.
For instance, this weekend Kristina and I spent some time hanging out with Mom in our parents' bedroom. We were all laying around on the bed with the dogs, wearing pajamas (quasi-matching, of course) and literally just being still....life was moving slow.
In this exact moment I found myself having this nervous energy, almost like I felt I needed to be doing something. I kept having to consciously tell my mind to be still, slow down and be present. To stop thinking about other things, creating a mental "plan for the day" or even checking social media for whatever reason I don't even know.
When Sunday rolled around and I knew it was also the day we'd be leaving, I felt a similar restlessness except this time the issue was with being present. In hindsight I realize that I spent most of the afternoon anticipating we would be leaving and in a lot of ways I missed out on the simple moments of the day. My mind was elsewhere, preoccupied with everything that had to be done before we left...when I would pack, what time we would leave, what I had to do when I got back that the thoughts just swirled and blocked me from being present. Instead of just going with the day and "rolling with the punches" I tried to prevent the punches...consequently I wasn't mentally present for any of it because I was thinking two steps ahead at all times.
After a weekend of feeling this at home, Monday came and I went to visit a good friend of mine and her one month old baby girl. As I sat there talking and catching up, I watched her sitting on the couch with her new little daughter. The baby was just still and she was forcing my friend to be still. The baby then forced me to be still when I held her. After our visit it left me thinking a lot about how we can be forced to be still and be present. I am wondering if the two go hand in hand.
I am finding that it is the smallest things that force us to slow down and pay attention. In my case this weekend, I began to receive this lesson by lounging around with our family dogs on a lazy Saturday afternoon and meeting a new little baby on a Monday morning. Now it is up to me to take this lesson and figure out how to apply it...figure out how to be still, slow down and be present on a daily basis. Definitely a challenge but also definitely something I need to be committed to right now. Stay tuned.
Does anyone else have issues with constant multitasking in your mind or with social media? Any tips for shutting down and allowing yourself to focus on the moment?
My problem is that I can never sit still at home because there are so many things to be done! I cannot lie on the couch, while looking over at a pile of laundry or dirt on the floor. It just stresses me out to the point where I have to get up and do something about it. I don't know how to cure this disorder I have!
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